Positive versus Negative Thinking Series
I am a cyclist and have recently changed from road biking to mountain biking. As you can imagine there are a lot more rocks on the road when I am mountain biking. I have realised that the way to avoid the rocks is to ignore them – to focus on the road ahead. As soon as I give the rock too much attention, I somehow gravitate towards it. My 4×4 instructor buddy tells me that when he is teaching people to drive on 4×4 tracks, he explains to them that if they don’t want to hit the boulders then they must not focus on them or they will be drawn towards them. And so it is with life, what we focus on we are drawn towards. What our thoughts and minds dwell upon consistently is what we become. This is why I mentioned in a previous article that we must choose our trains of thought carefully, and to assist in doing that we must know where we want to go. We must know or destination. We must know what we want.
I think many people’s problem is right there; they don’t know what they want. This is usually due to a few reasons; sometimes they don’t realise they can change what they have, sometimes people feel they don’t deserve anything better and sometimes individuals are just plain stuck in a rut!
I have often asked people to write down some goals. I give them a pen and paper and say write down their goals there and then. Often, very often they can’t do it. This is not good. How can we reach a destination if we have no idea where we are going? We have either no desire to know or simply just a very vague idea of what we want or where we are going.
Okay, so let’s take those 3 reasons why we don’t have goals, that I just mentioned, one at a time.
sometimes individuals don’t realise they can change what they have; This is a common belief and it’s just not true. Anything and everything can be changed, you just have to have the will to do it. Depending on the situation it may take some determination, it may take effort and it will probably take time, but every circumstance can be changed, you just have to believe it can and start changing it.
sometimes people feel that they don’t deserve anything better; this problem is more common than what you might imagine, but look at it objectively. Is anyone that different to you? Is anyone more special than you? There is no one saying you are not special, you don’t deserve to succeed and you are just average, you are never going make it! If there is someone up there telling you anything, he is saying that you are fearfully and wonderfully made, you are very special and he loves you! In fact if there is anyone saying negative things to you and pulling you down it’s probably you. It could possibly also be “Life Sentences” that has you trapped in those thoughts.
But I’m telling you right now you are just as special if not more special than me and I am very special. J Some may have more challenges than others, but no one, absolutely no one deserves to succeed any more that you do.
sometimes people are just plain ‘stuck in a rut.’ This is probably the most frustrating one for me. I see such wonderfully talented people that have just become complacent and settled into their particular rut. They have made peace with being okay, mundane and average. And I want to say “Wake up! Smell the coffee!” There is a wonderful world out there for you to experience and enjoy. Decide to get out of your rut today!
Once you have dealt with any and all of those issues in your life, you to need to set some goals for yourself. You can then start determining your vision and your purpose. We all have a purpose, and we need to get ourselves to a place where we can determine it. If you don’t have goals you focus on the wrong stuff, you don’t go anywhere other than around in circles.
You need to decide what you want and resolutely focus on it so that you can get there. Focus, Focus, Focus on what we want and we will get there!
“Focus on your potential instead of your limitations” Alan Loy McGinnis